Fallacious Forwards

Swiffer products don't contain anti freeze that will kill your pets. If they did, it would attack the kidneys, not the liver as told in that heart rending first person forward that's going around.

$32,000 worth of UPS Uniforms were not sold on e-bay, ending up in the hands of terrorists who might show up at your door. It did not happen.

Applebee's are not giving $50 gift certificates if you will forward an e-mail. Bill Gates and AOL aren't paying you for e-mails, either. Nobody is.

Madalyn Murray O'Hare did not try to get religious broadcasting taken off the air.

There is no lead in lipstick.

And on and on and on, these legends, rumors and conspiracy theories keep piling up in my mailbox. If I get one I have not seen a dozen times already, I go immediately to Snopes. com or one of the other sites that lets me know if it's true or false. Most of them are false. I never forward them.

DOES POWER CORRUPT?

Media stars have too much power. Dr. Phil and Oprah have too much power. Oh yeah, they do tremendous good works with their power. But something about it doesn't feel right.

Things that are harder than pulling teeth

Right at the top of the list:

Cancelling an internet service provider. They'll give you the rest of your life free, two months at a time to keep you from quitting.

Favorite Breakfast

I sit here chomping on ground up baloney, dill pickles and onions. I love it. Am I a sick man? Will I soon be one if I continue this diet??